When you go through a divorce, everyone seems to have an opinion about your relationship or how you should handle the split. The truth is that every divorce process is slightly different and certain strategies work better for some than others. Unfortunately, there are a lot of misconceptions about divorce, and knowing these fallacies can help you effectively navigate the process for yourself.
Getting Divorced is Just Like Breaking Up
While getting divorced is very similar to breaking up, it is also very different. Married couples often share more assets and have more legally intertwined aspects of their life compared to those who are just dating. This is particularly true in a community property state like California. Getting a divorce is a process, which means going “cold turkey” and starting a new relationship right away like you can after some dating relationships, simply is not an option.
Divorce is Not an Option
Some people believe that you should stay with your spouse no matter what. While this may work for some people, for others, divorce is the best option. Divorce can help prevent or avoid mental or physical abuse, or simply end years of unhappiness. Staying in a failing relationship is rarely good for anyone’s mental or emotional health.
Divorce is Always a Battle
Divorce does not have to be an all-out brawl. In fact, many couples find that working together to make decisions about many aspects of the divorce is more efficient and easier for everyone involved. Couples often collaborate through mediation or other means to determine how property should be divided or to create visitation and custody arrangements that work for everyone. Being difficult or aggressive in these decisions can make the divorce process longer, more expensive, and less efficient. It can also be physically and mentally draining as well.
Getting a Divorce Means that You Are Giving Up
Some people assume that the only reason people get divorced is that they are giving up on the relationship or that they did not try hard enough. This simply isn’t the case. Others have no idea what your relationship is like on a day-to-day basis. Sometimes divorce is about starting over or making a better decision for yourself or your children.
You Should Stay Together for the Kids
While it is generally true that having a two-parent household is oftentimes better for a child’s development, children’s growth can also suffer when they constantly watch their parents fight or struggle through an unhealthy relationship. Sometimes divorce is better for children than staying together. Moreover, children want to see their parents happy as well, and sometimes that means changing the dynamics of the family.
Divorce is Always Someone's Fault
While some relationships end because of something that one spouse did or did not do, that is not always the case. Sometimes couples just grow apart over the years, or they realize that their partner has changed over time.
The divorce process and the events leading up to divorce are different for everyone. If you and your spouse are considering a divorce, you may want to speak with a family law attorney in California for more information. Call Kayleene H. Writer at (949) 353-6151 today.